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Every Word that Comes from the Mouth of God

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By Beth White

Right now, I’m reading a book about interacting with kids. It’s called When Children Love to Learn, and it’s a collection of thoughts shared by different people who have taught children in some capacity. My personal reason for reading the book is to gain inspiration as I try to homeschool and parent well. Going through it, though, I found something that I thought related to us as students of the Lord.

                In one chapter, author Susan Schaeffer Macaulay explains that a well-meaning teacher will often ruin a lesson for their student. Worried that a story in itself is not enough, they will either provide their own interpretation or present the kids with a neat moral. She says, “We do all children a massive disservice when we ‘chew’ over the material and ‘spit the pulp’ out for them. People reject the secondhand results of someone else’s efforts. No . . . let the children remember because they took it in themselves. Let them think their own thoughts about it. Let them respond.”

                Reading this, I thought about how we as adults are also constantly force-fed somebody else’s thoughts about the Bible. We listen to our favorite podcasts, we read a devotional crafted specifically for us by someone going through the same stage of life, or we do a Bible study. But do we ever just read the Bible?

                It’s easier to read about the Bible than it is to read the Bible itself, but that is the one thing above all else that we need to be doing. Trust in your ability to hear from the Lord. He is not a tricky God, and He doesn’t make himself hard to find. In fact, what Jesus says is that “everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened” (Matthew 7:8).

                You don’t need somebody else to prechew the Lord’s words for you and pass along what they think is the main point. You, like a child, have a working mind and a heart capable of responding to the Holy Spirit’s touch. Get your nourishment directly from the source. If you are interested in learning from others, that’s great; there are some good teachers who have important things to say. But please don’t neglect the simple practice of reading through the actual Bible, with prayer. Allow God to surprise you as you seek His face directly and invite the Holy Spirit to be your teacher.

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Compassionate Fatherhood

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By Bill Naron

“As a father shows compassion to his children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear him.” – Psalm 103:13 (ESV)

Fatherhood is rough; parenting in general is rough. Children try our patience, they test our resolve, and they melt our hearts. We can go from disciplining or chastening a child to laughing and playing in a mere matter of hours. Often, we hear the expression, “Life is a roller coaster.” However, with children it is a roller coaster that twists, has turns, goes upside down, and travels at the speed of sound. Needless to say, being a dad is a tough task.

In Psalm 103:13, David compares the compassion that God shows to those who fear Him with that of a father toward his children. I was struck by this statement! How often do I show compassion to my children? Does my compassion look like God’s? Who am I reflecting? So many thoughts came rushing to the forefront of my mind. As a father who follows Jesus, I always make it my goal to show my children the way that God has changed my heart. It is my desire that I would give my children a small picture of my heavenly Father’s heart.

Earlier in this same Psalm, in verses 8-10, David lists attributes that signal the Lord’s compassion. He is merciful and gracious, is slow to anger, does not keep that anger forever, and does not repay our iniquities. In this Psalm, we see the example of how God shows His compassion to those who fear Him. This is what God’s compassion looks like. He sent his Son to pay our debt, to live perfectly the way that we never were able to live, and to make a way for us to become His children. All this was done for us when we were at our lowest point (Romans 5:8).

In the midst of COVID-19 and the usual busyness that comes with life in general, it is easy for me to lose sight of the important things. I can become so wrapped up in the things that I have going on that I neglect to consider the ways that I am engaging with my children. David tells us that God is full of mercy and grace and that He is slow to anger. However, many times I am quick to anger and lack much mercy and grace. In other words, there are times that I am a horrible reflection of the Lord to my children and wife. 

I think that one of the greatest responsibilities that is bestowed upon men is spiritual leadership. We are called to love our wives the way that Christ loves His church (Eph. 5:25), and we are to raise our children to serve the Lord (Eph. 6:4). Our job is to reflect our heavenly Father to our families. Leading our families, serving them like Christ, and showing them the same compassion that the Lord shows us—this is our greatest responsibility.

My challenge to you this week is to join me in starting fresh! Apologize, pray, seek forgiveness, and start doing fatherhood differently. Show your children, your wife, and the world around you compassion. Spend time in the Word with your Father in heaven. Spend time in the Word as a family. Ask questions about what your children and wife need physically, emotionally, and spiritually. By doing these things, we can reflect Jesus to our families and the world around us. 

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Discipling Kingdom-Hearted Children

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By Rochele Griffin

A few weeks ago, my children and I were feeling like we just needed to get out of the house. So we did just about the only thing we could do on a rainy quarantine day, and went for a drive. 

Just a few minutes down the road, one of my children asked, “Mom, do you think this could be the end of the world?” His question was not said in a joking manner, and it kind of caught me off guard. I hadn’t realized how much my children had been processing what was happening around us. They didn’t just see a change of schedule or plans; they were keenly aware that everything feels different. 

We have a choice in these moments with our kids to give a quick and comforting answer: “No buddy, it’s not, and we don’t need to worry about that.” Or we can stop for a moment and ask the Lord to meet us with wisdom as we speak to the souls of our little ones.  

2 Timothy 3:14-17 says:

14 But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have firmly believed, knowing from whom[a]you learned it 15 and how from childhood you have been acquainted with the sacred writings, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. 16 All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, 17 that the man of God[b]may be complete, equipped for every good work.

It’s our job to teach the word of God to our children. We are the ones “from whom they will learn it.” And we do so knowing that all of it is profitable and can and should be used for training in righteousness. 

During this season filled with hard questions from the searching souls of our children, we are given a special opportunity to address parts of their discipleship that may normally be overlooked. Coronavirus gives us the opportunity to step outside of the normal day-to-day training and teach our children that not only do we keep our eyes on Jesus, but we do so with strides toward heaven. 

So how do we point them to the joy of eternity in everyday coronavirus-impacted conversations? 

As our children deal with disappointment over canceled events, plans, and birthday parties, we draw their attention to the ever-certain, never-ending celebration that Heaven will be. (Revelation 19:6-9)

As we grapple over our rights and freedoms, we teach them (and remind ourselves) that eternity holds perfect fellowship with God and one another. It will never be interrupted—nothing and no one will ever strip it away. (Revelation 21:3)

As their tears of loneliness, frustration, and pain surface, we teach them that soon every tear will be wiped from their eyes. (Revelation 21:4)

As these days seem to get long, we tend to become irritable, and things aren’t as peaceful in our homes as we’d like them to be, as we take the steps to repent and make amends, we can teach our children that in heaven, every relationship will be made perfect. We will no longer have to seek peace, but will live in it, completely. 

It isn’t easy, but this is also a great time for us to open the eyes of our children to the sufferings of the world, to show them what it is to have a heart that cries “Lord Jesus, come quickly!” When our children have an opportunity to see pain in the world, we give them the opportunity to desire true healing. When our children are exposed to the results of widespread sin and the realities of depravity, when they glimpse the pain of life lived without Jesus, they can begin to understand not only their need for Him, but also the need to share Him with others. 

In this season, we ought to be expressing the joy of eternity come, so that our children can’t help but want to share it too.

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Manage the Family. Well …

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by Brian Waple

When our kids were growing up, we took very seriously our responsibility for raising them well (as good Christian parents should). We made sure they attended church every week; tried our best to get them into Sunday school as often as we could; said grace together before most meals; incorporated family prayer times; scrutinized the music, television, and videos they were exposed to; got them involved in Christian activities and events; bought all the Adventures in Odyssey tapes; read all the recommended “Raising a Christian Family” books; and tried our best to model what we thought was appropriate and biblical Christian behavior. So, you can imagine our surprise (and our sense of failure/grief) when, as young adults and able to make their own choices, they both walked away from the church. What did we do wrong?

Brian spoke about our responsibility as parents to be an influence on our kids, love our kids, teach and train our kids, nurture our kids, and provide for our kids. This is a monumental task of love … and, if you’re like us, you feel an immense burden when trying to make all this happen on your own for the kingdom of God. But there was something else Brian said … WE NEED HELP! Amen, and again I say, AMEN! In spite of what we may or may not do, we as parents have to trust that God, working through the Holy Spirit and the community of believers, will reach our kids in His way and in His time. In our own power (even with the help of VeggieTales), we can’t “save” them. As much as we want our kids to place their trust in Jesus, it won’t happen until God does a work in them through the Holy Spirit. I didn’t always know that, but I feel that immense burden lifted and a sense of relief when I pray for my sons and place my sons (now men) in God’s hands and trust that He will work His will in their lives.

Brian is absolutely right — God has given us the responsibility, as parents, for doing what we can so that our kids are brought up to know and love God; to understand Christ’s birth, life, death, and resurrection; and to believe that God loves them and wants them with Him forever. But in spite of our loving them, influencing them, training them, nurturing them, and providing for them, our kids may reject God and Christianity. But the hope we have as parents is knowing that God loves them and seeks to bring them to Himself. We still need to do our part. But just remember: in spite of our best intentions and everything we may or may not do, thankfully, God is still in control.

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The Right Question at the Right Time

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question-markBy Brian Sharpe

Have you ever been in a situation as a parent, boss, coworker, or friend where you didn’t know what to say or do when giving advice? You knew what the person should do, but you were sure they weren’t going to do what you thought they should. As a parent, as a friend, as a leader, and as a mentor, I have been in that situation so many times. My modus operandi is to just tell people what to do. The problem is, that usually ends up not going the way I think it should go.

I don’t know if you are like me, but I often think that if the world just did things the way I think they should be done, it would be a better, more functional place. I know that is arrogant, and most likely not true, but it is a thought I have.

I was recently in a situation where I was in conflict with someone that I respect. We both had different ideas of how something should be done. During this meeting, it was obvious that we weren’t seeing eye to eye. Martin was at this meeting, and he brought me and this man together to talk through and figure out what was going on. Before this meeting, I wanted to spend some time alone in prayer, seeking God and asking for understanding on why this other leader and I weren’t seeing eye to eye. As I prayed, I wasn’t getting any clarity to what was going on in this relationship. I could understand where I was coming from, and I thought I understood where the other man was coming from … but boy, was I wrong!!!

While praying, I called a mentor of mine, Jim. We usually meet once a month, but I needed his advice and his outside perspective. While on the phone with Jim, I explained the situation. I explained the reason for the meeting. Jim’s first response wasn’t to tell me what he thought I should do. His first response was to empathize, then to asking questions. He has a framework that he works though in situations like this, and the first thing is seeking to understand by asking questions. As he asked questions, he better understood the situation.

At this point, if I were Jim, I would have moved into telling me what to do. Instead, he started asking more questions about why I was responding the way I was. By the end of our conversation, it was clear to me all the ways I needed to own my improper leadership. I thought I knew what was going on, but I was blinded by my own biases. Jim was not; he was able to help me understand the blind spots in my life. He did this by asking questions, not by making statements.

I really am learning that this is the best way to help people. We need to become master question-askers. As a pastor, I see this. As a parent, I see this. As a husband, I see this. How often could an argument (I mean if Tomina and I argued . . . which of course we never do! JK) have been stopped if I would had asked a good question instead of making a statement? Asking good questions means you are seeking to understand, not make a point. This takes humility and intentionality. But in the end, I think it leads us down the path we want to go down, and that is to help others.

I have seen where someone asking good questions has helped me. I have seen where good questions have helped others. Leading through questions is hard, but worth the time it takes. In the future, when people are seeking your help or you are trying to help a family member or a friend, stop, think, and ask yourself what question needs to be asked, instead of what statement needs to be made.

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Purpose in Paper Boats

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By Nate Champneys

My five-year-old and I went down to the creek with some paper to make paper boats. In my mind I could just picture how awesome it would be to let those things go sailing down the creek. So we get down there and I fold the first one and I let it go down the creek. Kaelen was thrilled. But his excitement quickly faded into distress as the boat moved away. He waded after the boat and grabbed it.

“Kaelen, you have to let it go down the creek.” I said.

“No, I want it,” he said.

“Trust me, Kaelen. Let’s just see what happens.”

Frustrated, he slowly let it go. It went about 20 feet and got caught on a log. I waded over to it and Kaelen asked me for it. But I said, “No, dude, you have to let it go.” And I let it go and it sailed down the creek. By this point Kaelen is almost in tears and says, “But Daddy, I really want to keep the boats.”

I head back up the creek to where the stack of paper is sitting, frustrated because my beautiful plan of sailing boats down the creek with my son is not playing out the way I intended it to. But I suddenly think to myself, “Why am I so bothered by this? Who really cares if the boats go all the way down the creek or not? Isn’t the point of being here to have some quality time with my son? Instead I am driving him to tears.” Here I am, focused so hard on the end result of the boats, that I’ve forgotten that the goal of this outing was to have a date with my son. So I told Kaelen, “Okay buddy, I’m sorry. You can keep the boats.” The rest of the afternoon, I would make a boat and he would let it go ten feet or so, pick it up, and add it to his collection on the beach. (With the exception of a couple he let me send down the creek for my own enjoyment. 🙂 ) We came home with an armful of soggy paper boats, and my son was never more thrilled.

As I think about that day, I understand my mistake. I was focusing on what I viewed to be the end result: floating boats. I forgot about the process. I got focused on the “doing” and lost track of the “being,” the “doing” of sailing boats instead of the “being” of being a father to my son. This way of thinking is visible throughout my life and is something I fight daily. In another blog post I wrote about how God’s purposes are wrapped up inside the process of life. We tend to view things as “the end justifies the means” and focus on doing whatever we have to in order to accomplish a specific project. But from God’s perspective, I think that often the means ARE the end.

Romans 8:28 says, “And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.” Sometimes we hear this verse and we think, “See, God is going to make everything I do prosper.” But that is not what this verse says, nor is it what the surrounding verses are trying to communicate. God is about His purposes. Not ours. In verse 35 Paul asks the question, “Does it mean He no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death?” This question implies that we will face these things. We may face trouble. We may face hunger or destitution. We may face persecution. How is that things working together for good? Well, according to my purposes, it isn’t. But it is good because all those bad things work together to accomplish the good thing: His purpose.

God is at work in us, with purposes all throughout the process of life, with the ultimate destination being greater than our immediate happiness, but more so, our holiness. Our job is not focus on the fact that we haven’t arrived at this destination but to be with him in the process, and trust him with it, knowing that we are deeply loved and leave the results up to Him.

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