Intentional living

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by Brian Sharpe

Intentional living is tough. It is easy to make plans…it is hard to carry them out. In life we are thrown many curve balls that take us out of our routine and often messes with our intentionality. Even good things can take us away from intentional living.

Recently Tomina and I went on vacation. While on vacation we wanted to make sure we didn’t take a vacation from being intentional so we talked through what we would like to do on this vacation to keep being intentional. I have a friend who has been an unbelievable model of intentionality with his family. He went away with his wife and while they were away for their anniversary they read a book together, they studied the same passage in the bible for devotions and they walked through some goal setting. Remembering this, that was what I talked to Tomina about. Tomina looked at me and said “Thanks for leading.” Men that was an amazing feeling to feel for what seemed to be the first time like I was leading my family well.

Well, we read “Radical Together,” which was a great book. We also studied Hebrews. Those were the easy things to do. The setting of family goals seemed to be the hard part. We finally did it, but it wasn’t till the 18 hour car ride home. Now that the goals are set we need to keep them in the forefront of our minds, so that they can be accomplished.

I write this to encourage men and families to take time to get away from the norm, not to just get away, but to get away and reflect, plan and set goals as a family. We don’t just become the people God wants us to be without a consistent refocusing time where we make sure we and our families are on the right trajectory. It is way too easy to think that we are living for God without asking God if we are living for him. When we take time away and seek him, he will reveal who he wants us to be and who he wants your family to be.

Jesus modeled this throughout the gospels. Jesus would leave the crowds. He would leave the disciples. He would go off to be alone with the father. It is something we need to do. Vacation is a great time to do it because we are away from the everyday demands of life.

My challenge to you between now and the end of the year is to get away for a day and seek God and ask him what are some things he wants to do in you and your family in 2012.

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Personal and Corporate Growth

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by Brian Sharpe

I would hope as believers our hearts desire would be to grow in our relationship with Jesus.  I would hope that we would say specifically that our relationship with Jesus is the most important relationship we have.  When we look at the Bible both of these statements are at the forefront of the minds of the authors.  Their lives were all about Jesus and growing in that relationship.  They gave up jobs.   They gave up positions of leadership.  It cost a lot of them their life, but nothing else mattered.

Since 1999 I have been working with students to help them grow in their faith.  Over the years I have found that weekend and week long trips are one of the best ways to help a group grow both personally and corporately.  The question I ask is why?  Why do we see more growth on these short trips together than any other time?

I believe that when you live in community with the same goal of growth and service to God you will grow.  That is what I saw a couple weeks ago in Rockaway.  You had a group of students and adults that were there to serve God and grow in their relationship with Jesus.  As a group we processed life and faith every night both individually and corporately.  It was amazing to see God show up.  It was amazing to see God break down barriers.  It was amazing to see God visibly change students.

Is this possible in the large church?  Do we have to be on a trip together as adults to grow personally and corporately?  I think it would help, but it is not practical.  I think what needs to happen is that we make sure we intentionally find people that we can grow together with and not be willing to keep the status-quo.  It is where you and this group are willing to ask tough questions and would be willing to pray for and walk with each other.  To me this sounds a lot like our community groups.

Community groups are our adult small groups.  It is where we meet either every or every-other week.  We pray together.  We study the word together and we talk life together.  It is where we get together to serve God and grow in our relationship with him.  If you are not in a community group make sure to make it a priority this fall.  If we are not living in community with other believers it will stunt our growth in Christ.  God has created us as relational people.  We need to seek out others to grow with.  We need to seek out and be in community.  We need to be in a community group.

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Making Your Dreams Come True

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by Brian Sharpe

When I was in High School my wrestling coach had me set goals. I wrote them out and then put them on my dresser. When the season was done I looked at my goals and I had reached every goal but one. This is something I let slip away until last year when Tomina and I set some family goals. I am not sure we did that well at meeting the goals, but it was helpful. We are going to sit down next week when extended family is gone and set some goals.

The New Year is always a good time to evaluate where you are in life and set goals. At 33 am I where I wanted to be? I am not sure I can answer that question because I had nothing to measure it against until last year. That is why goals are so important. It helps us evaluate where we are. We can have dreams, but dreams will not come true unless we put things in place that will help us accomplish those dreams.

Tomina and I place our goals on a mirror in our room. Families should pick a place to put your goals so that way they are always in front of you. Parents this is a great way to help your kids understand the desire of your heart for your family and for them spiritually. The following are principles that Tomina and I are going to use to set our goals as a family.

Specific: Include details, numbers and time frames when setting goals. The more specific you can be the better.

Measurable: Ask yourself some questions after setting the goals. How will I know when I have met this goal? How often? How many? If you are able to answer these questions you have a measurable goal.

Attainable: The goal you set has to be able to be completed or it is not attainable. Focus your goals on what you can control, not on the things you cannot control.

Relevant: Don’t set a goal just to set them. The goals you have need to have a reason behind why they are a goal. Answer the question “why is this goal important.” If you cannot answer why it is important then the goal is not relevant.

Trackable: Each goal needs to have a time element to it so that you can track your progress in achieving your goals.

When Tomina and I set our goals last year we thought of areas we wanted to set goals in, but then I read a book that had a section on setting goals in it. So here is the list they have compiled.

Goal headings:

  • – Spiritual
  • – Financial
  • – Martial or Relational
  • – Familial
  • – Vocational
  • – Ministerial
  • – Physical
  • – Intellectual

I am looking forward to what God is going to do in your family and mine. I am looking forward to what God is going to do at Elim in 2011. God is at work. We need to be faithful to be who God has called us to be. One of the ways we can help ourselves is by setting goals.

Some of this content was taken from “Grow Minister Lead book 2” by Bill Allison

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Mutual Community

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by Brian Sharpe

When I was in College I grew a lot spiritually.  It was not because I went to bible school.  It was because of the relationships I had.  When I graduated high school I was involved in “church” activities, but I was not really growing.  The college pastor and I started a friendship where we talked life and God.  That was the start of my growth.  I also had two friends, Jon and Matt and we pushed each other spiritually.  I know I talk about this a lot, but that is because it is biblical.  We need each other.  We cannot grow spiritually on an island.

Jesus gives us the great commission at the end of his ministry.  Matthew 28:18 Jesus came and told his disciples, “I have been given complete authority in heaven and on earth. 19 Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. 20 Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”

Jesus tells the disciples to make disciples and know that He will be with them always.  There is a sense of mutual community.  Jesus in relationship with us will help us make disciples. Matthew 18:20 says that when we as believers gather in Jesus’ name He is with us.  God desires us to live together with one another in mutual community.  As we live in mutual community, God shows up and works in us and through us.

Do you live in mutual community?  Today in the Christian church in America there is an independence.  All I need is me and God.  This is a true statement, but it is an incomplete statement.  If we want to truly grow then we need God and one another.   That is the way God works.  He works in community.  We see that in creation with the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.  We see it in Jesus’ ministry with the 12.  I know I see it in my life.  When I have people I can be real with, I grow spiritually.  Who do you have?  Whose life are you speaking into?  Who is challenging you to grow closer to Jesus?

There are a lot of lonely believers in the Church because we don’t make an effort to take relationships to the next step. Mutual community is hard.  It costs us time and emotional energy.  It forces us to be intentional with our relationships.  Mutual community is all about taking the relationships to the next step.  It is where you are willing to move past the surface of sports and daily routine and willing to ask questions about life and faith.  Are you willing to go to the next level?  Are you willing to live in mutual community?  I know I need it!  I know right now I have mutual community.  My heart is that we will all live in mutual community.

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Lessons From The Beach

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by Brian Sharpe

For me the beach is a very relaxing place.  As a family we were blessed to have someone let us stay at their beach house for a week.  We went to the beach every day.  Most days we went to the beach several times.  While at the beach I love to wade ankle high and just watch the waves come in and go out.  I learned a lot during those times over the week.

One of the things learned was discipleship happens when you live life together.  My daughters have a lot of personality.  They love life.  My oldest, Ellice loved getting in the water.  Even though the Pacific Ocean is really cold she wanted to play in the waves.  I had a choice as a dad.  I could have said, “sweetie, it is too cold to go in the water.”  She would not have been happy with me, but I would have been justified in saying that.   I gave in and let her play in the waves.  I taught her the “proper” way to take on the waves.  I taught her to jump when the wave was just about to hit her.  We would hold hands and go out as deep as she wanted to go and then we would jump over the waves together.  It is a memory I am not going to forget.  Well, my middle child, Annyah is a little less adventurous than Ellice.  She did not want to get too deep into the water, but she wanted to play by the water.  Ellice would be out a little bit jumping over waves.  Annyah would go a little bit into the water and then run away from what she perceived as a big wave.  Well, after a while I noticed that Annyah wasn’t too far from Ellice and she too was jumping over waves.   They were having a great time together laughing and jumping over waves.

If disciple-making is about taking what you know and passing it on, then Ellice made a disciple of Annyah.  How often do we in in our church try and figure out the best way to make disciples?  We plan and we sit and try to come up with the best programs, but what we aren’t doing is living life with people.  We need to invite them into our lives, into our families, so that they can learn just by being around us.  They can learn just by us walking with them and talking about spiritual things.  If we want to make a difference on South Hill, then we need to create space to share Jesus with those in our neighborhoods.  We need to do this by living life with them.  That can and should lead to spiritual conversations where we can introduce them to Jesus.  This starts with us living life together, desiring to make disciples who make disciples.

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Intentional Living

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by Brian Sharpe

I have been in ministry, working with students, for 10 years. Over the years there have been themes that God has brought out through teaching or experience.

Over the past couple of years I have been hearing the same theme. On the Evangelical Free Church Student Ministries Council I serve on, in staff meetings, in training seminars, and just as God teaches me through His Word, He has been calling me to intentional living.

The problem is, it is easy getting caught up in what needs immediately to be done — the tyranny of the urgent. You think, if I don’t do it then it no one else will.

I am a doer. I like being a doer. I will help in most situations. If a storage room needs cleaned out, I will help. Martin often says I need to focus. This is a part of intentional living, having in mind the things that are important so you will focus on them. Doing everything in your power to stay on track and accomplish the “big rocks” in your ministry and life. (Big rocks are the most important things that need to be done in ministry and life.)

As a believer in Jesus, in life and ministry I have two main foci. These need to rule everything I do. They are: the Great Commandment, and the Great Commission.

Jesus gets asked the question, “What is the greatest commandment?” And He answers this question. His response summarizes the most important thing that you and I can do with our lives. There is no bigger rock in life or ministry.

Jesus says in Matthew 22:37-40: “You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ The entire law and all the demands of the prophets are based on these two commandments.”

These verses for believers should form the basis for our everyday intentionality. They should be what we live for, what makes us tick. When we are building our lives around them, our hearts and lives will change. We will be different.

What defines you? What are your “big rocks?” If we desire to live intentionally, we will ask these kinds of questions. Then we will be compelled actions. That’s where we need to be. We need to be moved from hearers of the word, to effectual does of the word. This goes along with the beatitudes. When we live as God calls us to live in the beatitudes, and then action will be the result. James says you will see my faith by what I do. We are saved by faith, but that fail compels us to action.

I know I have a long way to go to live intentionally. But I need to start the process. I need to ask the questions and allow the answers to shape the way I live.

A couple of years ago I was listening to a sermon. A statement that the pastor made will stick with me for the rest of my life. He said, the way we live shows us who is on the throne of our life. How you answer these questions defines you. Knowing what your big rocks are will help you see who or what is on the throne of your life. Take time this next week and asks these questions. Evaluate how you are living and be compelled to action.

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