FollowBy Beau Leaman
I grew up in downtown Puyallup with everyone on my mother’s side living on the same street. It was our turf. We played army together, tackle football in the mud, and attached sleds to our ATV’s in the winter. It was a little bit of paradise.
I attended a private Christian school in Tacoma, and my church family was only 15 minutes from our house. My parents not only taught me the word, but they lived it. Daily routines consisted of family prayer time at night, family devotions in the morning, and countless hours of Scripture memorization. In grade school, according to my mother, I was always known as the kid who hated to be in trouble, and was honest as soon as possible with any mistakes.
One of my biggest strengths is empathy. Since I was a child, I have always been concerned with those less fortunate than me, as well as those put down for another’s personal gain. I always had pretty decent grades, and for quite a bit I was the most athletic kid in my school. On the surface I had a great life, and no one looking from the outside would ever beg to differ.
While I was considered athletic, it came in seasons. I dealt with a lot of insecurities. I found my worth because of my athletic ability, and when I did not perform, I chose myself as my authority. Growing up, I fed my insecurities by having as many friends as possible and when I needed God to walk with, I chose myself as my authority. I wanted to be known as the kid that had it all together, and when people did not see me the way I wanted, I chose myself, instead of God.
Six months into my marriage I had a necessary “Come to Jesus moment.” Things were not the way I had envisioned them, and that was my first problem. I had not given my marriage to Christ, and allowed Him all authority in my life. I believe each person, young or old, enters a crossroad in their life. This crossroad could be your testimony, a time you truly felt you became a man or woman, or simply surrendered your life to Christ.
After my first year of marriage, I was at a crossroad. Choose God as my authority, or continue to feed my insecurities and ruin my marriage. Praise God I chose to nail my insecurities to the cross. This was not simply a magic potion ordeal, but a process I chose to give to Christ, and take up my cross. I wrestle with this daily, but I find hope in 1 Corinthians 10:13 that there is nothing He will not come along side me with, and be my refuge.
Really think through your life. Who is your authority? You? Or God?
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